Lost in the Woods..

Over the last few weeks, I have been using an analogy or scenario to explain the way I am feeling and the way that I am praying for Branson. I understand that when anyone hears what is happening on a physical and scientific level, that different people have entirely different reactions.  It is hard not to approach the situation with your own life experience in tow.  I have been met with comments such as "She is healed and you will see that," as well as comments like "God knows best and we will be here to comfort you when she is gone."  I have heard the entire spectrum of spiritual guidance and I can honestly say that I find it all very comforting.  I just know that people experience things differently.  Some people immediately prayed for healing while others prayed for comfort for us in our grief....and i get it.....and understand it.  
However, this analogy will help to explain where I am a little.  It is hard to explain, but I will attempt to do so.

Branson is lost in the woods.  She might be an infant, toddler or small child. It doesn't matter. She is lost in the woods and it has been hours since anyone saw her.  People are gathering in our back yard, frantic, searching, sobbing, trying to figure out what they can do.  Police are scouring the place as the sun begins to set.  As parents, Will and I are devastated and frustrated and pleading for God to rescue her.  We are searching and screaming her name.   People begin offering their guidance and what they feel is helpful advice.  A woman walks up and says,"I know a good physical therapist that Branson can use when she gets found since she may not be physically well."  Another woman, dressed in hospital scrubs says, "I will preform her surgery when you find her." A woman walks up to me and whispers in my ear that "Jesus knows best," and another woman tells me of her niece who is mentally challenged and has been going to a great program.   A man wearing a sobering face slips a business card into Will's hands for funeral services.  A child runs up to us and says, "if it gets dark and we don't find her can I go play video games inside?"  A man hugs both of us and says "Sometimes we just don't get God's ways."


During all of this, God has freely given me the ability to extend grace to all of these perspectives.  I feel loved and comforted by everyone God has placed in our path this month.  


But all the while, I want to stand in this back yard, in the midst of the search and rescue team and scream, "NO....We pray for a whole and perfect recovery!  We don't pray that she is partially recovered, that her limbs are partially whole, that her brain is partially functioning!" What parent would ever pray for partial recovery of their child who is lost in the woods?!"


To me, this makes sense. It makes sense that, until God leads us to something else, we will pray for her complete and perfect healing! She is still alive 3 weeks after they gave us a fatal report and we will continue to pray for PERFECT healing until God leads us to pray for something else.  He has not given me a diagnosis to research or prepare for...He has not given us evidence of physical deterioration in her body.  Her heart beats, she breathes, she moves inside of me.  She is alive......and just as if she were lost in the woods, we will fight, search, pray and seek the Lord for a complete and perfect return to us.